Sure, Rambo 4 sucked.  And Rambo 3.  And the Rambo: The Force of Freedom cartoon blew chunks… but the first two were pretty good, right?!  I mean, at least they were memorable!  So, let’s take a walk down that memory lane! Come with me as we load your oversized weapon, strap on your red headband, shoot up some steroids, and look at some violent trailers!!!!

First Blood (1982)

A 2min 30 second version of the whole movie; John Rambo comes to town, gets beat up by the cops for doing nothing, then he escapes into the woods where the police go after him after being warned not to, only to have Rambo turn the tables on them and whoop their buts with bullets, a big knife, and a lotta things going boom.

Notable dialogue:
Trautman: You send that many, don’t forget one thing.
Teasle: What?
Trautman: A good supply of body bags.

Rambo: First Blood Part II (1985)

Sooooooo many muscles flexing just to tie his shoes. I believe Hans Zimmer draws all his inspirations from the ‘music” in this trailer. He just watches it through bad speakers and book, instant movie score. This is where Rambo movies start to go a little astray. John goes back to Vietnam to rescue some POWs and while he’s there, wins the war for America. Once again a trailer that shows the entire movie, even the part where America turns on John Rambo. Also, gotta love how every time he shoots he’s just jerking the gun every which way spraying bullets all willy-nilly.

Notable dialogue: YYYYAAAAAAARRRRRGGGHHHHHH

Something I want stitched into a lace pillow: “What most people call Hell, he calls home.”